How many times a day do you use the word BUT? As in, "I'd love to go with you, BUT I have other plans." "I wanted to attend that conference, BUT I couldn't fit it into the budget." "We discussed her performance, BUT nothing has changed in the way she performs her job."
Whenever I lead a class or facilitate a workshop, I deliberately bring in the topic of positivity. It seems like we're bombarded with negativity in social media, on TV, and particularly in the news. The good news often goes unreported. . .the negative news is what brings in readers and viewers and, consequently, brings in revenue. The sensationalism of negativity seems to drive business. HR Studio Group is driven by positivity and we try to demonstrate this in deliberate ways.
One thing I try to do is replace BUT with AND whenever and wherever I can. I've started to hear myself think of how I can do this before I speak the words. "I'd love to go with you and I think I can rearrange my schedule so I'm available after 2:00 that day." "I wanted to attend that conference and plan to work it into my budget for next year." "We discussed her performance and I'm monitoring her closely so I can provide step-by-step guidance in the way she performs her job."
Listen to people when they talk. Listen to the news. Listen to the conversations you have and, unfortunately, you'll soon start to hear all the BUTS. Now, imagine how those conversations would go if the BUTS were replaced with ANDS. This small change--a one-word change in the way you phrase your sentences--will help you shift out of the negative and into the positive.
It's not a big change, but it is something.
It's not a big change, and it can change your perspective and the perspective of those you're talking with.